A Lost Soul

I am a fourteen year old high school student. I was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of ten. I started cutting myself when I was nine and still haven't stopped. Over the past few years, I've seen a lot of psychiatrists. Nothing they said seemed to help. It wasn't until I lost it in school and became violent towards my friends when they finally diagnosed me with Bipolar. I was thirteen then.

This year has been very hard for me to live through. My good friend committed suicide. I was devastated and I just wanted to die. I didn't interact with people much after that in fear that one day they would leave me too. My mother finally had me committed into a psychiatric facility. It helped me to get away from my problems and I felt better for a while. However, when I was released I just came back to my everyday problems.

A few weeks after that I was diagnosed with anxiety. I have a great fear of people and lack of trust in one so close as my own mother.

Even today I am still fighting the suicide thoughts. The only reason I feel I am alive is that I would never want to put my mother through all the pain I watched my friend's mother go through. So I'll keep on fighting my battle until it is won.